How I Fell in Love with Networking (and Stopped Hating Marketing)
This summer, I gave myself a challenge. I called it my Summer of Love.
No, not the 1967 flower-power version, though there were plenty of joyful, surprising, even psychedelic moments! For me, the Summer of Love was about reconnecting with the heart of coaching: People.
The idea came from a Mid-Year Momentum workshop I attended with the wonderful Monia Pyraki, designed for female entrepreneurs. We spent time reflecting on the first half of the year; what had worked well, what was still on our “to-do” lists, what we wanted to celebrate, and so on, and then turned to the second half: what would we consciously choose to take with us, what would we leave behind,and what would we say a wholehearted yes or no to once we left the workshop?
In that moment, I said a big fat no to marketing that drains my energy and joy. and said a huge yes to connections because I realised that meeting new people is one of my biggest energisers.
We each chose a word as an intention for the half-year ahead. Mine was unique. At the time, I didn’t know exactly why. Now I see it was pointing to this: the celebration of our uniqueness in relationship. That spark that happens when two people meet each other as themselves that lights a fire.
So, I set myself a project: to ditch the heavy, joyless marketing and instead spend the first month of the second half of the year saying yes to conversations, yes to curiosity, yes to connection.
And that’s how my Summer of Love began.
What I discovered
I reached out to coaches from all over the world. Local coaches I invited for real coffee; international coaches I asked for a virtual one. The invitation was simple: hello, this is who I am, Coaching Supervision is what I offer and would you be interested in a 30-minute coffee chat?
The variety was astonishing. I spoke with a former NYPD detective now coaching men on mental fitness. An app designer and relationship expert using the circus in a fascinating a metaphor for accurate personal or professional relationship pairing. A firewalker who builds coaching around resonance and vibration. Musicians and even hoteliers and financial experts that bring the foundations of those skills into their coaching style and offering. Coaches working with poetry, AI, scouting principles, trauma healing, and team harmony – leaning into understanding of the body, the brain, communications, body language, complex systems, hypnotherapy, creativity and so much more.
Each conversation was unique, humbling, energising and full of joy.
And here’s the thing: I went into these chats with no agenda except meeting someone new. No pitch. No clever positioning. Just me, curious and open. And what I found was this:
The best conversations happened when I consciously decided against marketing.
The marketing paradox
Coaches (me included) spend a lot of time polishing our “brand.” We agonise over niche (how I dislike that word) statements, websites, professional photos, LinkedIn profiles and perfect client personas. We want to be viewed as the kind of coach people should hire.
But in my Summer of Love, none of that mattered.
What mattered was showing up with interest, curiosity, and unconditional positive regard. No assumptions. No expectations. And actively disregarding any assumptions around who the person was based on their LinkedIn profile or website design
One of my favourite moments was a conversation with a coach who came from a marketing background. I admitted how much I respected what he did and how much I hated marketing myself. He smiled and said:
“This is the most powerful marketing of all. Your network is your net worth.”
It stopped me in my tracks. I hadn’t thought about it like that before. I’d been doing what I loved, connecting without agenda, and it turned out to be the very thing I was trying to avoid.
Paradoxically, the most human, joyful conversations came when I ignored the marketing mask entirely.
It turns out, the most magnetic form of “marketing” is not marketing at all. It’s authentic, heart level connecting.
What I learned
A few gems I’ll carry forward:
- You can’t plan another human being.
- Curiosity beats strategy every single time.
- Connection is richer when you drop assumptions.
- Expect nothing, and be surprised.
- Being yourself is enough.
- Celebrating uniqueness in each relationship is where the magic lies.
Of course, not everyone said yes. Some people were sceptical about why I’d want to chat, some politely said no thank you, and a few no’s were sharper than I expected. A couple even left me rather shaken.
And yet that was part of the learning too. I realised that connection has to be chosen, not forced. Those moments of rejection became an invitation for me to stay humble, to meet people exactly where they are, and to answer even the stinging no’s with compassion, love and understanding. They reminded me to stay curious about what someone’s past experience of a “random coffee chat” might have been, or what they might be carrying in their lives right now.
Doing this work helped me rediscover something vital: rejection doesn’t diminish connection, it helped me learn more about myself. And it gave me even more joy and energy in the yes’s. The laughter, wisdom, and generosity of those who did meet with me reminded me why I love this profession, why I do this work, and why it matters.
One more surprise in many of these conversations was how little clarity there still is around coaching supervision. Some coaches had never experienced it, some mistook it for mentoring or peer coaching, and a few felt their supportive friend was enough. Others were almost relieved to have a safe, friendly space to ask their “silly” (of course there’s no such thing!) questions. A handful even said they didn’t need supervision at all.
These moments reminded me how important it is to keep supervision visible, viable, and valuable in our people profession; a professional space to work with cases and to learn and grow from our own humanness. It also reminded me how much I love creating that safe, non-judgemental space where curiosity, reflection, and growth can flourish, and where coaches can recharge and stay safe and sane. And always, there’s plenty of laughter and love to hold the supervision space learning.
Gratitude
I’m deeply grateful to every coach who gifted me their time, stories, laughter and wisdom. Each of you reminded me why I love this work. You reignited my passion for coaching and supervision and gave me a reading list that may last a lifetime! I still have calls booked into my calendar from my Summer of Love right through until October, so I’m certain there’s lots more love, laughter and learning waiting for me with all those friends I haven’t met yet…
Looking back, I see that my word unique shaped it all. Every coach I spoke to was utterly themselves; different, powerful and inspired and inspiring. And together, those differences created the most uniquely beautiful harmony.